I decided to delete the post I wrote yesterday. I needed to write it, to vent, but I am not comfortable leaving such negativity out there. I am not sure if I should be comfortable or not... I want to be at peace with my shadow not in love with it.... I was also having a dose of hormones it seems, which I was not expecting.

The thing is, although I have my irritation towards this person, they are a good, kind and caring person. Their only fault is that they are a little insensitive to those small cues others give so that you either live with things or you have to be very definite, stubborn and almost, rude. Not something I find easy.

They are retired and live alone with no Mother now and a Father who is nearing the end of his days and will be glad to rejoin the love of his life. Siblings all have kids and grandkids. I am not sure why she has no family of her own, why things did not work out that way exactly. I don't think it was what she wanted and I don't think there was enough flexibility there. But how can I say? Maybe the right person didn't turn up in this life? Maybe the right person turned out to be the wrong person. I look at pictures of the young woman with my Uncle and I look at her now and it is hard to believe they are the same. Did he change her like that? Or did she allow too much bitterness to remain in her heart? Or maybe if she had managed to be more flexible back then, maybe they would still be together....