Dreams (Can Come True?)

Last night I had one of THOSE dreams. The ones that feel important.

It started off very innocently with my sister and her man woes and that is all I can remember of the beginning, it wasn't THE dream, just the lesser dream THE dream grew from.

I was an environmental scientist (yay for actually being what I trained to be) and I needed to go and investigate a site called the North Wall. This was a feature of a rocky outcrop situated off the south coast of Britain. The North Wall was a narrow rocky ridge between two larger rounder rocky outcrops. An almost island. The wall was at the North of the almost island

We, myself and three others, took a boat to the North Wall. Once there we found that there was a rope strung along the wall which we had to grab, everytime a wave came, for fear of being washed away. Three big waves came and we all grabbed the rope. The fourth wave came and we all went under.

Next I was floating upwards. There was dots of light, kinda like amoebas. I blacked out, time passed.

When I woke, I was in a cathedral and I was confused as to how I got there. The vicar came to help me and all I could really remember was that whatever had happened, had happened at the North Wall and I had to go back there. He helped me get there, to the harbour town where the boats to the wall left from.

The day was calmer, sunny and I took a tourist boat to the wall. As I climbed on to the wall and walked along it, I first met the ghost of my baby. I was surprised to discover I had even had a baby. Then I came across the spirit of one of my companions from the wall exploration. He told me some stuff which I don't remember, but it became clear that I too, had died.

I persuaded him to get on the boat with me as it was time to leave. He did but was uncomfortable, he continued to tell me things, to explain. As we got to shore he told me could not stay on the boat when it docked because to leave the sea and the wall would be too much for his spirit. Because he had died at sea, on the Wall, those were the places his spirit could travel to. When I had died, my body had been taken from the sea and had traveled to brighton and then on to London and because of this, I could travel to. One month had passed since I had died.

He dived into the sea. The boat docked and I stepped onto dry land.

I woke and knew this was an important dream. Partly because of the level of detail but more importantly the 'feel' of it. I know that much of this dream is shaped by the things I have been reading recently. Supernatural by Graham Hancock. Sum by Sam Eagleman. The North Wall comes straight from Game of Thrones which I am watching on TV. but

I also know that given the detail this will take quite some analysing. But I know I need to.

***

So, Supernatural.This books is all about the range of human experiences that shamans experience and how they are common to ALL societies, at ALL times, including our own. That the spirit world exists and interacts with our own. That every society has shamans who experience interactions with the spirit world, drug induced or not.

I am currently reading about the similarities between alien abduction and shamanic trips to the spirit world. It is very compelling to me and feels right.

It seems many people who experience these happenings do not remember but that they tend to have had certain types of experiences within their life and these happenings can be accessed via hypnosis. 1 in 50 people, at least. So what is the probability for me? Not bad, given my life.

So, the experiences often begin in childhood. The spirit guides often make themselves known in the real world first. People who spontaneously become shaman often have a period of illness or of mental unhappiness and this is often accompanied by intense dreaming. They often have unexplained scars.

Well I can't remember things but, I do often get that feeling of falling back into my body as I wake up. I remember feeling that as a child too. I also wake up sometimes, with that feeling I have been somewhere wonderful. I experienced a long period of illness in my teens which culminated in a nervous breakdown, so I experienced both of the life events that can be symptoms of the change in to a shaman. I definitely get the dreams.

I have a long thin scar on my left breast, above my heart. I have always had it but yet no one remembers how it got there. It was there all through my childhood. My Mum, who is medically trained, shrugged her shoulders and told me it was probably a cat scratch or something that resulted in scarring because of it being on sensitive skin.

The Medicine Cards recently revealed that my totem animals have a strong canid bent, with dog, wolf and coyote walking along side me. What better animal to have entered my life as guide than a dog? And there was one. A stray we found on the way home from school, that bonded very strongly with me and who, everyone agreed, was a dog in a million. She knew. She always knew. As I coped with my illness, walks with her, on the hill, were my only solace. She turned up shortly before I got ill, no more than a year before.

Other things in the book, so far, just resonate with me. One of the most shocking was in the colour pictures. Included are some paintings of scenes from the trances of a shaman. In the very first of these is a figure, a sleeping green, voluptuous lady, on her side. As my painting of myself in BIG I painted a sleeping lady, on her side in a very similar pose. Mine is less voluptuous but that is not because of the image in my head being very different, it is because of my aversion to my own weight. The skin colour is also different and the arm placement is slightly different. But I look at her and feel that she is too similar to ignore and she sleeps in the background of this shamanic painting.

I have just read about how some shaman are given books of knowledge. I too, have been given a book, but in my dreams.

Supernatural looks at trance as a route into the spirit world, but what about dreams. I know I am a dreamer, maybe, just maybe....?

So... I am going to start Sam Eagleman's book Incognito next and I know he talks about all the things our brain gets up to without letting our conscious mind know. I don't think my oh so logical consciousness can cope with some of this stuff, very easily because it does not fit with it's view of how the world works (and that view is very important to me! Last time it broke, so did I). Supernatural is helping expand my view so that these events are possible, so that if I were to believe, a little bit, it would not break my world apart. if it had happened to me, I would expect my brain to filter it out. My consciousness often filters out emotions. It can be very good at it. I have had to learn how to unfilter some of these messages.

It also helps explain a dream a while back in a different light. I asked about my lack of energy (which has since improved dramatically and I no longer feel the cold in the same way) and the dream message came back as something along the lines of we didn't know, we will fix it. I interpreted this as higher consciousness.... but.....

You see, I know, most people who read all of this, who make it all the way to this point, will be my friends, who share similar world views, who won't think I am crazy. A lot of other people would read this and think I am crazy.... Maybe I am. I don't really care. Time to think about going to work....