World Web

I have been gessoing and gluing and creating pages all set for one of the 21 Secrets classes. All this effort and I am really only just on the prep part.... And I am still not a 110% sure how I feel about journaling but I love learning technique - how I use it is up to me.

I think there is a thing or two about me and life here. I love to learn anthing and everything but I will use it how I please. Rip it up and put it back together in some new form that suits me.

I did that when I read and read after my nervous breakdown well over a decade ago. I read and read and took bits from here and there and constructed for myself a world that would not break around me as it got proved untrue. My Christian world of childhood broke irreparably under the pressure of the real world, as I stepped out of my family home as an adult. One event and it started to all unravel.

My new world view has the benefit of being more web like. If one thread unravels others take the strain and the web grows new strings, better suited to the world all the time.

I am trying to grow strings that take towards where I wish to go. I know there is success in this. I have been striving for happiness and contentment and I have grown many strings that have helped me get better at this. Happiness and contentment are things we need to practice.

I know where a lot of my early strings came from, Scott M Peck, Gill Edwards' Living magically, Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway, Carlos Castaneda, Paulo Coelho, Sheri S Tepper, Sharon Shinn, Charles de Lint, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, The Tao of Pooh and Te of Piglet. And a hundred references i picked from people, TV, film that I can not remember. My web grows, flexs, repairs. *sigh* The Tibetan buddhist monk I tried to chat up in town one day because he was rather cute, and as it turned out, rather interesting *laugh*.

In my view any dogmatic world view just can not do that. By saying this is the way it is, you take away a practices ability to change. Everything needs change and influx. My brain and my world web thrive on it. This is also what the internet it is..... the web of us that use it, coming together, changing, growing, learning. There is more to the internet, so much more. I am sure someone must have studied the spiritual ramifications of the internet?

I read a new idea (to me) yesterday. That the Goddess has her own cycles and her disappearance from the world is part of her own cycle, her dark part, her new moon. I am still pondering this. How and in what way it may or may not become part of my web.....

I am a sponge, soaking up the world and information and reformating it. I still have no idea what to do with it all..... Except live. As best I can.