Rambles with Myself

I am tired. Today I went back to bed and slept the afternoon away. My Order of Services are working their way towards completion. The innards are tripped, held in place with white ribbon and a heart sticker painted in the styley of the hole thing. Some have paint on the covers, about a quarter. And I just need to keep going is all... I am nothing if not stubborn though.

My heart is yearning to decorate the spines of my guest book and photo book. I have white acrylic to paint the spiral binding and some silver interference paint to put over the white. I have white feathers and silver and white ribbons in a shimmery material and white satin ribbon from the Order of Services. I have material from the bridesmaid dress as well as my own and intend to make some little calla lillies and ribbons. I also intend to make stencils to paint the covers in the style of the invites. And this one off sort of creativity is just more appealing than being a production line.... but the Order of Services have to be done before the wedding, but the decorations on the books don't....

I just lost my train of thought because a teenager came to visit - this blog is definitely not open to S! I have no idea if this is permanent or temporary. I feel for him.... anyway. he now has the wii.... *grin*

I have some things I am procrastinating over - like my hair - why don't I have this sorted? And the flowers, why are they not sorted? The transport was not sorted but conversations with friends seem to be sorting that in a very satisfactory style, without me actually doing much..... but yes, I feel like I am trusting these things to the right moment - but how do I know this isn't just procrastination and indecisiveness or even just plain old not particularly liking making telephone calls to strangers sometimes?

I am struggling with S in some sense (see, my brain really never left that distraction! *laugh*). He isn't overly fond of being by himself, doesn't really know what to do with his own space and has absolutely no hobbies or pastimes that do not involve electronic wizardry or being out and about spending money.... Mind you, neither does F.... and it doesn't seem to do him any harm - actually that is not quite true.... he does have non-electronic hobbies and pastimes. he has friends to go see and a bike to ride. S is stuck here.... but by his choice. but he does need a hobby or two....

He will also need to come to a decision about the days when F and my shifts do not mean there is someone in the house. It is hard. Maybe we just need to trust that he is ready to be by himself - he is old enough. I guess we shall see tomorrow - with his Dad off a night shift and asleep - how he does in reality.

Still very proud though.... Seems he is happy to share who he wishes to be with us. Seems he has shared this with his other family and it has not gone down so well. Why do music choices often end up being so divisive? Anyway, enough rambling, I have wedding things to do.....