Little Dog

Tonight we watched Marley and Me. Oh I cried sooo much. F said he had a lump in his throat but he looked at me and saw all the snot and tears and laughed.... The lump went away.

It made me think about Little Dog and Big Dog. Big Dog was on the edge of old age when he was diagnosed with bone cancer out of the blue. I still miss him.

Little Dog is about 5, so she should have years and years before we have to face any unpleasantness.... The longer the better, the more time we have with her that she is happy and in good health the better.

Both dogs would not be described as entirely normal. Not as insane as Marley was perhaps but I don't think F and I are drawn to nicely behaved normal dogs. Part of that is that we go for rescue dogs. An abused dog is always going to have quirks. Big Dog never lost his for sure!

Little Dog was never abused (as far as we know) she just was tooooo much for all her previous homes. She had had five when we got her at seven months! She is just too clever to not have had an owner when she was little who was prepared to be dominant.

We found it hard. Big Dog needed bringing out of himself. He needed reassuring that uncrossing your legs was not a sign he was about to get kicked. He had to learn that a raised voice was not so scary as to require he wet himself. He did learn. You would always get the stranger who would say 'oh I am good with dogs' and charge straight up to him, despite you saying that he wouldn't like it. He could move pretty quick being a greyhound....

Little Dog was never like that. She was insane from the start and I struggles in a way I never have with any abused dog. We read books. We cried. We suffered. Eventually a friend got a dog psychologist friend who worked with a charity to call us. We explained that raised voice meant nothing to her, that a tap on the nose was a call to play.... How do you train a dog to understand what is wrong when you can find no punishment or way of effectively expressing displeasure?

He told us to exclude her whenever she was behaving other than we wanted. She wanted to be part of the pack and not being part of it would be a far more effective punishment. I remember the first time we shut her in a different room. She went mad, scratching the door. She did learn.

I sit here on the sofa now, with her fast asleep, nestled between my legs, using my foot as a headrest. I know that at some point in the night, she will join me on the bed. Maybe before F comes to bed, maybe at the same time, maybe at some point in the night when she feels a little cold, but when I wake she will be there. Stretched out into a long thin line between us, completely snug. She has no problem with being squashed, or covered in duvet, sometimes her head will burrow under us and you have to wonder why she likes that when it is obvious she can't really breathe!

As she sleeps I can pick up her paws and move her legs. If she is in a deep sleep I might get a growl as she wakes but she is the most malleable dog I have ever known. Her greyhound flexibility makes her an excellent contortionist and with her smaller collie sized frame, she is not too long and boney to be comfortable in those positions. She is so laid back.....

...except when she is play mode. Then the rough and tumble rat dog is still very much there. I fight with her on the bed. We have a whole variety of games. Roll on the dog. Catch the hand. Trap the hand or foot under the duvet. All have infinite variety and end with a cuddle.

My favourite has to be when she goes upside down. Being upside down is always a sign of happy relaxation with her. Teeth stick out and she appears to be grinning. She lays her head back and exposes her long whit neck for tickling. Legs stick up in the air and she exposes everything for a good stroking. Her white under fur is so soft. But she does look so completely daft!

She is a dog in a million. She is mine.