Lost in Music

I stopped listing to music.

There are so many reasons for this. Old tapes gone bad. Splitting up with an Ex with such a good music collection that I had not bothered buying any in a long time. F having so many CDs that mine got lost amongst his (and a lot of them are toot as they were freebies). No working tape or CD player in my car. Lack of money to buy the music I wanted on CD.... and it goes on...

But then I got a new car... with a CD player... and a little socket for plugging in an ipod.

This sparked my interest in music. Finally I had somewhere to listen to music of my own, whether F liked it or not. (This isn't meant to make F sound bad but I do have a slightly less mainstream interest in music than he does and I adore hi so much that sometimes I let things slide when I shouldn't. F actually likes far more of my music than I ever suspected!)

So I bought an ipod and started filling it with F's huge number of CDs. All of a sudden I could find my music again! Then I started buying music again and I also discovered colleagues with similar tastes in music to me and their suggestions helped as well.

All of a sudden my musical world has gone BoooOOOMM! And it is really quite nice, because I always loved music and I have no idea how I forgot that.

I grew up on old style rock really I guess. Some with a more up to date slant, such as Bon Jovi, but I grew up listening to all sorts from Hendrix to Poison, Pink Floyd to Yes. So many trends in rock to explore...

Then I met a boy who was a year or two older than me, my first real crush. Unfortunatley it did not end well but he did make me a mix tape and exposed to me to some really interesting music that my sheltered life had not thrown my way.

My sister was a Goth by this time with a love for the Cure, All About Eve and the Primitives. I followed in her footsteps but that tape threw me onto the alternative side of things. I discovered the Pixies, my most favouritest band ever. They have since become a cult band to the next generation and my old vinyl is probably worth a bit now.

Then I started my A-Levels and my world opened up. Grunge exploded into life - Pearl Jam, Nirvana, Garbage, Alice in Chains. Indie was sooo strong then, fuelled by the NME and Melody Maker, before Brit pop stole it's name and it began to die. Rage Against the Machine. These were the groups I listened to as I turned into an adult. Nine Inch Nails, Faith No More and more, but I still loved gothy stuff and the Sisters of Mercy and the Cult were big favourites.

Then I left home. Other influences hit me. Rave and techno. Orbital and the Prodigy to begin with. A couple of years later i fell in love with a Raver. He had gothy mates as well as raver mates from Uni and six varied individuals lived in a houee together with additional boyfriends and girlfriends in residence. They included DJs amongst their numbers.

At this time Goth and Techno shared a lot, which may surprise people now, I don't know. There was a crossover and this spawned cybergoth. It's influences are seen in other areas such as Steampunk i think as well.

Shortly after this I left the city and moved and lost contact with my music. For a time...

..but music sings in the soul and is always waiting there for you, when you want it.

So has my taste changed? Not as much as you might think.

Has music changed? No, all of a sudden many of the aspects I loved the most have been given new life with Emo, Skate Punk, Twilight and Vampires. That industrial vibe is alive and well and living happily with cybergoth and steam punk in a huge burst of creativity fuelled by manga.

So the music that sings to me has not grown stale and old but has found a voice in a new generation and I love it all. I love the mixing of rock with dance. Linkin' Park, Crazytown, Good Charlotte.... I love the vibrancy and energy and still, my tastes are not quite the norm...

So what does my music say about my soul? That I feel intensely and I like to dance...